Sunday, December 05, 2010

Scenes from a Marriage: Wood edition

"We can't leave it at home"

"I guess. It might fall over or something"

"Yeah. So we take it"

"Do we have to?"

"Do you have a better idea?"

"It is cold outside"

"It likes the cold"

"Not this cold"

"We will wrap it in something. Its got a sweater right?"

"Yeah, someone gave it one"

"That should work"

"A sweater for sub zero temperature?"

"Its got tolerance. It got it from me"

"But you are wearing sweater + some wool jacket"

"It will manage"

"It has to manage. Not like it has a jacket"

"Well yeah, we ought to get one"

"So you go get jacket. I will go walk on Heath and come back"

"Alright, then you take it"

"No, you take it. How will you know if its jacket fits?"

"I will buy standard size"

"But its smaller than average. I think you should only take it"

"It won't like the Tube"

"You don't have to take the tube to go to store. Just go to the Gap on high st"

"Gap? Did you say Gap?"

"Why don't you go to Polarn then and spend ten times as much for stuff that was made in the same sweatshop but has stripes and is green?"

"Because Bamse says so"

"Can't argue with that. Go on then. Take a taxi"

"There is no baby seat in taxis. So I can't take it. You take it"

"You take its seat from the car"

"You know what? Lets forget the jacket for now. We will get it later"


"We will just wrap it in some warm thing and take it"

"What if it crawls out of it?"

"Do you think we should like tie it with some string?"

"Lets just go alright? The sun won't be up for long"

"Alright. But lets not go near the children's park okay?"

"Why? Its not bad there. And it might also like the place"

"Don't be silly. We can't go there"


"Think! Who is likely to be there?"

"Who? kids I guess. But there is nothing one can do about that"

"Who else?"

"Parent types?"


"You just ignore them no?"

"Yeah but guess what they are going to do when they see this thing wrapped up in some quilt with a rope around it?"

"Oh like that"

"Yeah. Like that. Child services will be knocking on our door very soon"

"We could do without that"


"But you know, you can't end with that"

"I know. We are stuck aren't we?"

"Yeah, can't even make a bloody post nowadays without monkey in a leading role"

"This is what it has come to? Fuck"

"I know. Fuck"