More Rooster stories

Once every couple of hours, the Rooster gets mocha frappuccino cravings and runs away to Starbucks. By the fifth time, we decided to go along with him just to make sure that its just the coffee.

We enter the store, the Rooster points out the mocha frappuccino and jumps up and down, bemoans the absence of Starbucks in Sweden, goes to counter, orders the frappuccino and a couple of Belgian chocolate brownies (yes, now you know why I like this guy),turns on full charm and makes small talk with the girl at the till. Nothing strange. Then,

"That's 6.80"

"Here, let me give you change"

The Rooster pulls out wallet which is the size of a football. He takes out a couple of bills, and then empties all his change on the counter. There are about 35 coins.

"Let me see now. Here's 50p, no, that's Swedish krona"

The girl at the counter, in an attempt to be helpful, picks up a couple of coins.

"This looks.."

"No, not that. That's Danish 20p. Here, take this"

She looks a little confused.

"50p..."

"This doesn't looks like..."

"Oh I am sorry, that's Finnish"

The girl is more than a little upset now.

"Here, take this"

"That's Euros Sir"

"Oh, I am so sorry but I always end up with different currencies in my wallet and its confusing"

I pull out my wallet, and take out a few coins and give it to the girl.

"Here, I have change. That's 2.80...that's enough, right?"

"Yes, thanks ma'am"

The Rooster glowers at me.

"What? You don't want this money now?"

"No, its alright"

Five minutes later.

(Bill) "What was that about?"

"Yeah, what was that I am Scandinavian, I travel all over vibes you were putting on? And don't look at me like that. What did I do?"

"What did you do?! I had this nice little thing going on there..."

"Yeah right. That girl was going to throw you out any moment"

(Bill) "Wait, that whole thing is your pickup line?"

"More like pickup process"

"Pickup process? But wait, Finland is Euro"

"Exactly"

"But why confuse the hell out of that poor girl by throwing out so much change?"

"Billster, don't tell me you can't figure that out"

"No, I see it but I was just thinking that I can't calculate tip"

"Nobody said you can do arithmetic"

"I see. Does it work?"

"Sometimes"

"Wait, hang on both of you, you are telling me that you pulled out all those coins because you wanted to test her arithmetic skills?"

"She is cute but you know, I have standards"

*********

This next segment isn't exactly funny and I am not comfortable posting all of it, so this might seem more choppy than usual. I couldn't resist posting this mostly because of the dig at the end!

An hour later, we are on the grass at Regents Park enjoying some rare sunlight and talking about the Rooster's future plans. Astute readers no doubt remember that our Rooster is another Sergey Brin in the making.

"Yes, if this takes off, then I will have to move to San Francisco for a while"

"Yeah, that makes sense"

"If I live there for a few years, its not unlikely that I will meet someone I like"

"If you stop working 255 hours a week, yes, that's probably true"

"That can be managed. Its also likely that she will be American"

"In San Francisco I won't be that sure. But I see your point"

"Anyway she would want to live in the States"

"That's a problem?"

"Yes, because if we decide to have kids, then they will be American"

"What?"

"They will be American. That's unacceptable"

"Why? You don't mind living there but you don't want your kids to grow up there!"

"Of course. Can you imagine your kids growing up to be American? Why are you both laughing so hard? What's funny?"

"Just thinking of people I know who don't want their kids to be American"

"Yeah?"

"No, just that they reach the same conclusion for diametrically opposite reasons"

"Oh, I see. Anyway, it is unlikely that I will end up with an American woman"

"I thought you just said it was likely"

"Yeah, but there are so many cultural differences. It will be difficult to make it work"

"Cultural differences? Between you and this woman you will meet in San Francisco? Right"

"No really. I agree, its not the same as A~ and M~ where one of them is Indian and the other is American but still there will be differences"

"Like what?"

"Gender issues, I guess. That's the main one"

"What?"

"How many American women do you know who are feminists?"

"Well, you are most likely to meet them in San Francisco than anywhere else in the country"

"That doesn't mean much to a Swede"

"You are telling us that you will meet no one in the States who has similar views on gender?"

"No, not that. Its easy to be that way right now"

"What?"

"When we are young and single and there's just two of us all this is easy"

"Yeah?"

"Yeah. This happened in Sweden during the second wave. But once people settle down especially once they have kids, women just revert to gender stereotypes"

"Stop working or switch to part time, move to suburban obscurity, become a soccer mom types?"

"Yes, that's all that happens in the States. That's a little difficult to take"

"Oh! So all you want to do is to sit at home while poor partner does all the work and brings in money"

"No, that's not what I said. That's your husband you are thinking about there"

In other news, a whirlwind trip to Chola land is happening tomorrow, so will be out of commission for the next 48 hours or so

And yes, just saw the Man Booker longlist. We will do a proper mela this time. There's so many authors in there I know nothing about and should rectify that. Will put up Mela post once I get back. Falsie, as usual, you are signed up for everything except the one you couldn't even finish.