Friday, December 05, 2008

Scenes from a Marriage: The Leather Glass Edition

(Nope, nothing has changed since paper and cotton. We can't possibly get more boring. Makes one wonder how one is going to spend rest of life. Anyway. At least we know how it ends.)

"Hey"

"What?"

"I have to go to work tomorrow"

"Nonsense"

"I have a real job you know"

"That pays how much again?"

"Money isn't everything"

"Right. You can't go tomorrow"

"Why not?"

"Because its your turn to go see apartments"

"I know. But I can't"

"I spent all evenings this week trudging up and down in the freezing cold looking at places. Now its your turn and you can't do it. How did I not know this?"

"I meant to go but I can't. We can go over the weekend"

"As per this timeline, we are supposed to see second viewings of the shortlisted places on Saturday"

"Oh the timeline! Set in stone obviously. What will happen if we slip may I ask?"

"We won't have a roof over our heads"

"Don't be melodramatic"

"Yeah, the truth will sound like melodrama to you"

"We can always extend the lease"

"And never move"

"It isn't that bad. Let me look at this timeline of yours. Do you have to do everything in Excel?"

"If you have a better way of figuring out which apartment to choose, feel free"

"You do realise that none of this matters? We will finally see the one apartment which we both like and that will be it"

"What are you smoking?"

"Yeah okay, that was a little too much. But I am not sure this optimisation algorithm will work either"

"Let us not change the subject. We are not talking about my optimisation algorithm. We are talking about why you cannot go see apartments like you were supposed to"

"I told you. I am expected at work. I need to sort out some stuff for the paper"

"How many papers are you writing?"

"Just a couple but they are a lot of work"

"I bet"

"You don't believe me, do you?"

"I believe you. That's not the point"

"So what if we stretch this timeline? We can decide next week, can't we?"

"What makes you think that next week you will be able to see apartments?"

"I can next week. We will find a house next week. It will be like that four floor house"

"One room on every floor, totally impractical but very charming house next to Heath?"

"Yeah, like that only"

"Don't be silly. When was the last time we made an impractical choice?"

"Oh well"

"Anyway, what do you need a house for?"

"Are you mad?"

"No"

"That's what we have been talking about for the past half hour"

"No"

"No?"

"No"

"Enlighten me please"

"Why do we need a house?"

"Because our lease is running out"

"Okay?"

"And we need more space. This place is overflowing with stuff. No place for clothes, books, stuff"

"So?"

"And we need change. The type we can believe in"

"If this change is about moving to a house, I don't want to believe in this change. Don't want to move either"

"Oh"

"You move to a house. I am not moving"

"Yeah get it. House"

"Yeah"

"Flat. We will get a flat"

"Yes. Houses are dangerous"

"And expensive"

"Yeah"

"And more importantly, boring"

"More boringness won't be good"

"Agreed"

"But we need to move"

"Yeah some excitement in life"

"That's how we create excitement. By moving"

"That's what it has come to? No!"

"Yes. And it has taken what, three years?"

"Fuck"

"I know. Fuck"

3 comments:

blewgenes said...

celebrate your love veeno and billo :-)

so are you gifting each other shiny leather pants and expensive cool glasses

this reminded me of the flat hunt last year when we guys also tagged along to find the "perfect one" and the same healthy conversation between you both :D

blackmamba said...

Happy Repeal Day! Oops, Anniversary!

Space Bar said...

what? no one else has publicly wished you two and made bad jokes and hijacked the comments for nefarious purposes? what is this: you mean we are all getting as unexciting as you claim your marriage is?